You have been seeing him for a while now but do not love him. He has been pressing you to marry him but you've been putting him off. You weigh your options and realise that you do not love him but will marry him anyway since you've been going out.

This is what is called a 'Pity Marriage'.

Remember that you must never ever marry anyone out of pity.

Psychologist and psychotherapist Varkha Chulani says, "A marriage like this is born out of just pity and it will not work. This is because when you pity someone it is difficult to respect that person as you go on. And if you marry him because you feel sorry for him for whatever reason you will realise in the future that it was a wrong thing to do."

Annabelle Rodrigues, 32, manager, operations says, "I married Rodney out of sheer pity. I realised my mistake a month into the marriage."

Their friends fixed them up and Annabelle continued seeing Rodney inspite of the absence of chemistry. She liked him as a friend and nothing more. He was nice, decent, but that is where it ended for her.

"Rodney became a habit. Seeing him, going for movies and dinners became a habit for me," she says.

What she did not realise was that she was leading him on in the process and she accepted his proposal out of guilt and pity for him.

Consequences of a Pity Marriage:

1. There is no love in the marriage and you end up living a lie.

2. You lie to yourself and your partner.

3. You get anxious and frustrated as days go by.

4. You end up feeling depressed.

5. These emotions will lead you to gradually hating your partner.

6. You two will end up arguing ad fighting a lot more.

7. The marriage could also end in a bitter divorce.

8. Incase you two have kids then the situation will get a lot more complicated.

You may pity your boyfriend for whatever reason but remember that the pity should not end in a marriage.

It is better for you to tell him how you feel honestly if he proposes marriage to you. He will hurt initially but that is a pain he will be able to get over.

Also Read: Are You Marrying Mr. Wrong?