Set Priority

We asked people to rate from 1 to 10, their priority to the looks of their partner, one being the highest. Here are the two contrasting responses we received…

• Andrea Fonseca, who is currently taking a break to complete her studies, rates looks at a 4. " Marriage is all about accepting each other as they are, but I would never be able to spend my life with someone who is not attractive enough for me."
  
• Nilima Kadam, a young media professional, considers looks way below at an a 8! " I think he should be financially independent and an emotional person to understand me. For me his character is more important his looks, they can be transformed."

Both of them here are making a point. Attraction is very important it will keep the relationship live and fire burning. Especially for women who are looking for someone who they are attracted to as they can give them good looking and healthy children. Also remember that good looks and attractive looks are very different concepts!

Rejection

It is not uncommon that you hear of someone being rejected on the basis of looks. This happens especially in arranged marriages.

It is difficult for a person to accept and get over rejection, which is one reason why many people insist on a photograph before meeting personally.

In most matrimonial Web sites, you will find people listing their preference for a 'very fair or fair' partner. Although, this leads to a different debate altogether of whether complexion should matter or not, it is still a major source of insecurity among many.

Take the case of those who are at one end of the spectrum, say 'very fair' and their partner is at the other end, i.e. 'very dark' or to be politically correct 'wheatish brown'. Throughout their life, even if they themselves are not concerned, people around them might continue to comment.

This can lead to a lot of jealousy and unwanted comparisons, which will eventually affect the relationship.

Physical Compatibility

Physical compatibility is a major cause of concern among many couples. If one is physically fit the other has to be the same for a successful relationship.

If you feel that you want to marry the person for their personality and values, but you are concerned about him being overweight then find out whether he is willing to work towards it.

Couples now days join a common gym and workout together. This results in good health and helps them spend more time together and strengthen the relationship.

However, sometimes it may not be as simple as that. For instance, if the person is too short or too tall for you and you are always going to feel inadequate walking beside a partner.

These are not things can be worked out. It may seem too frivolous a reason to not marry a person, but it can lead to serious consequences later in life. For example, you may resent your partner, if your child is also short.